Cube Life Letters

by john on March 18, 2003

Pud has posted some pretty funny internal memos this week:

Visual demonstration of a CLM(Career Limiting Move)
Don’t even bother reading through this entire memo, you’ll get the drift after the first paragraph or two. The guy just goes on and on and on bitching and moaning about this and that, in a memo he has sent to a widespread and most likely completely inappropriate mailing list. At the end he invokes the Federal Whistle Blower law as if the government set the program up to protect losers who don’t like the fact his company uses metrics to run the business and at times expects more out of their employees.

On a positive note this internal memo does give some interesting insight into AOL(America Online). You can just picture the Save Coaches running around on the Save Floor, trying to Connect with their Members so that they trust them for a Lifetime, and not just for 30 or 90 days.

Don’t make up words when writing about professionalism
What could be funnier than someone writing an email to complain about people shooting rubber bands in their cubes (the gall!), threatening to place a warning in everyones personnel file since they don’t know exactly who the perpetrator is, and threatening “penalty” if it continues? How about making up the word “Professionality” to describe the behavior you want to see people display. Dude, you could use some professionality yourself.

My Star Wars figurines are NOT porn stars
I don’t even know what to say about this one, except he has to know that following this email it’s just going to get a lot worse. Certainly barnyard animals will be introduced soon. Perhaps the figurines provide the spark and creativity he needs to get through his work day, but unless he wants to give in and appreciate his co-workers humor he had better bring them home, where he can comfort them in the evening.

I sure wish Pud didn’t charge so much for access to all of his memos. $45/month is really a barrier to entry. But I certainly do enjoy the teasers.

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